Down and Out........

For some time now, I have noticed a somewhat unsavoury character slouched in the doorway of a sleazy establishment known locally for its Ladies of the Night. Every afternoon without fail as I drive home from work, I see this dubious gentleman laid across the steps of this infamous institution, come rain or shine - and even when it’s persistently pouring, he is still stretched out like Cerberus guarding the gates of the Underworld, clutching a beer can in his grimy paw. He has been a fixture of this doorway for so long, that when I round the corner one day to find the doorman has deserted his post, I am momentarily disconcerted but give it no more thought as I wend my weary way home.........

However later in the week, I discover what has become of Cerberus........he’s gone on his summer holidays!

For three days now in the sweltering heat of an Indian summer, I have passed a ‘body’ lying against a garage wall en route to work, the only evidence of life being the varying positions it assumes each day. Usually cocooned immobile in a filthy blue sleeping bag, various extremities take it in turns to protrude from one end or another - sometimes feet (still shod) and occasionally woolly-hatted head, but there is one thing that is always in place...... a large half-empty bottle of dubious golden liquid. I shudder to think of the possible contents.

This morning however, his sleep is obviously disturbed, and trapped in the crawling traffic jam, I watch with interest as he wriggles within his nylon cocoon like some monstrous chrysalis ready to disgorge its unlovely contents into the outside world. Then, just as the traffic begins to move on, the chrysalis splits and vomits forth a tousled and filthy Cerberus onto the grass where he stretches his wings, belches, scratches his genitals and turns to pee against the garage wall he calls home...........

I drive on to work, content in the knowledge that at least someone is watering the parched grass..........